"Suppose 500 black people were to drive to a white neighborhood to challenge the voters right to vote?"

--Jesse Jackson on the Ohio election shenanigans

Those democrats are always whining about their rights to vote and shit. Just shut up already, you whiners!

You know who whines the most? The French! They even drink wine.

HA HAH AH AHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!1

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 1:36 PM ] |

If I wasn't evil, I'd agree with this guy.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 11:55 PM ] |

After yesterday's election, Ive decided it's too much effort to swim upstream anymore. I'm changing my alignment to Lawful Evil.

I voted for Bush three times. That guy appeals to both my xenophobia and my love telling other people how to do things, plus he kicked a lot of ass in Iraq. (I like kicking ass.)

I love the flag. And I love families. But I hate drugs and I hate sex, but most of all I hate when our president thinks about things too hard. I want a LEADER. I don't want some wishy-washy flop-flipper who sits around considering the implications of every decision he makes. Just get in there and DO IT. Let other people worry about the consequences. That's my motto.

It's all going according to my plan.


Mwhah-ha-ha-ha...

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 1:06 PM ] |

Before I became an internationally recognized expert on pornography, I taught welfare parents in inner city Atlantic City, NJ. It was kind of a cool job, because the people were really interesting, but it kind of sucked because the pay was bad and the company I worked for--founded during a mad rush of privatization during the Reagan administration--was basically a sham. The CEO was a douchebag who had more interest in catching a bunch of money falling from new federal programs than in education; everything was on the cheap so he could keep the runoff. We had shitty supplies, no support, and the computer education I was supposed to provide consisted of lessons in BASIC on a couple of battered Apple IIs. The school would enroll anyone, and never kick anyone out because then they would lose their "tuition". Aggressive recruiting led to a class full of crackheads and undiagnosed retarded people and non English speakers. But I dug them (mostly) and really wanted to do a good job-- help people who hadn't gotten a lot of breaks in their lives but were, by and large, just like me and my friends.

I bring this up because it's election day. And we studied democracy and voting and all that nonsense, and I found out that none of my students were registered to vote. Not one. With the focus on the importance of turnout in today's election, no one has mentioned the main reason my students gave for not wanting to register: They didn't want to serve on juries.

Most of my white, comfortable friends regard jury service as a nuisance, but we're okay with it. We're not desperate enough to committ crimes, so we're okay with sitting back to judge The Other People. But if a distrust of police, prosecutors, and "the system" was ingrained in you from birth, and you'd watched juries and judges toss the people you loved into prison on a regular basis, you'd feel differently. You'd feel like staying as far away from courtrooms as you could. Not giving up your name to anyone, and never, ever helping those motherfuckers.

But I tried to convince the class that voting was a good idea, and they owed it to themselves and their communitities to get out there and make their voices heard. We took a field trip to the county clerk's office: One white teacher and like 15 minority students, and they signed up. (Well, half of them, anyway...a few had felony convictions and a few didn't buy into "Mr. Steve's" line about how their voices mattered.)

It felt good walking in and asking a surprised clerk for 15 voter registration forms and 15 pens, but I doubt more than one or two of them actually got out to the polls.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 7:44 AM ] |

Hollywood's annual Halloween parade didn't happen this year. Canceled. But no one got the memo. Hollywood Blvd. was deluged with people last night. Thousands of people milling about or sitting on the curb and watching the parade of current and recent cars. These weren't the upscale party-types who frequent the West Hollywood parade either. These were the people people. Lots of Hispanic families dragging tired little Frankensteins and Drackalas around. Lots of chicks in fairy outfits (that's a big one this year) and even a weird White Van with a loud speaker blaring church music staffed by volunteers for Lyndon Larouche handing out crazy-making political literature. Four guys in perfect Ghostbusters costumes (including the often-overlooked black Ghostbuster) parted the crowd and met cheers. A tall man in black hood played a trumpet and people followed him. I guess to see what he was all about.

The police showed up on flea-bitten nags and SUVs and urged the crowd to disperse. Megaphones were employed. Bilingual instructions to the costumed masses to please go home. Stop gathering. There is no parade here.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 9:53 AM ] |