I bought a DVD collection of the films of Gualtiero Jacopetti last week.

Jacopetti is best known for Mondo Cane, an early sixties exploitation documentary that, through footage shot in distant (and not so distant) locales, relentlessly illustrated the idea that humans are cowardly, worthless, brutal creatures who bring only pain and misery on themselves and everything around them.

But it's funny, too.

Later, Jacopetti made Addio zio Tom (Goodbye, Uncle Tom), an dissection of slavery in the United States. Shot in Haiti under "Papa Doc" Duvalier, the movie seems by turns like a righteous cry of anguish at historical injustice, an incitation to race war and a cheap porno movie. Imagery typical of the film: Lily-white slave owners hold a rational conversation around an ornate Southern dining table on the nature of freedom while black children crawl around on the floor begging for chicken bones, a beautiful black woman is raped by a retarded buck while a slave-breeder watches passively, a soft-focused shot of a young white girl in Southern belle finery walking seemingly hand-in-hand with a black boy, until the camera pans closer and we realize she's leading him around on a leash, etc. etc. for over two hours.

Uncle Tom doesn't allow the cheap, teary-eyed sentiment that you see in something like Roots or Amistad, opting not to end on a happy note of newly-freed slaves reaching "da promised land" or whatever, but instead with a series of fantastic cracker-murders committed by afroed Black Panthers. Brutal and hard to watch, but compelling.

Uncle Tom is like that new Mel Gibson movie... the one where Jesus gets beaten up like Glass Joe in Punchout for two hours. I doubt Jacopetti made his movie with the idealism that Gibson has--he was way too cynical for that--but the pouring-lemon-juice on social wounds nature of each film is very similar. Ultimately, Addio, zio Tom didn't cause the controversy in the U.S. that Gibson's Passion has, mainly due Jacopetti's bad filmic choices (the disjointed nature of the narrative and the constant focus on naked flesh) and his reputation as an exploitation filmmaker, but it's worth a look in light of this recent release, as much for how unrelenting it is in expressing an upsetting opinion as anything else.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 6:41 AM ] |

I was just reading "The Koop Scoop, " a webpage for Mr. Koop's 5th or 6th grade classroom, and Mr. Koop's assignment for today ("Thursday Night Fun Night") is:

"1. Be creative in coming up with 5 jokes to share with the class. Make sure you write them on paper!!
Have a FUNNY night. Enjoy Survivor!!"

I object to Mr. Koop encouraging his class to watch Survivor, and I object to his overuse of exclamation points, but I fully support the decision to go with the paper option when it comes to writing down jokes. I hope Mr. Koop posts the jokes themselves when they're handed in. 5th Graders are funny.

Here's a grade school joke courtesy of my brother-in-law:
Q: Knock Knock.
A: Who's There?
Q: Frankenstein.
A: Frankenstein who?
Q: Frankenstein in his underwear!

Completely unrelated to Mr. Koop, jokes or Frankenstein,Here is a gallery of pictures of my friends holding a baby, the amazing Abigail Daywalt, surely the finest baby I have ever seen. See for yourself, whydon'tcha?

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 1:03 PM ] |

People often ask me my opinions on the issues-of-the-day. And by people I mean "no one". But if anyone ever did ask my opinion about politics--or really anything-- I'd be all: "I'm gonna vote for the smoking weed party, man." Then the suicide.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 9:37 AM ] |

I Just received the following "Instant Message"::::

"AcmeAVN: here's a funny headline:
FOX LEADS CRUSADE AGAINST SMUT TV
A six-week print advertising campaign will urge parents to make greater use of the V-chip to block programs that fail the "decency" test.
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/news/archive/2004/02/23/financial1035EST0044.DTL

AcmeAVN: dude, blog it!"

I didn't even read it, "ACmeAVN", but are you happy now? You can just go to hell with the rest of your kind. And by "your kind" I mean sinners.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 9:21 AM ] |

My co-worker Frank Meyer writes the excellent Porning Report for Variety.com. I suggest you read it. It's impressive. But today I was checking out the rest of the blogs on Variety, and ran across a review diary of cheap-o movie "swag" sent to the Variety offices. Fascinating descriptions of knit caps, t-shirts and press kits are yours to behold, all described with that delightfully snarky "insider/ironic" sensibility pioneered by David Spade.

Also: The Pentagon is reporting the world is coming to an end.

The exact correlation remains to be determined.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 7:05 AM ] |

Stills from Japanese Mannikin Tv Show Oh! Mikey!

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 6:05 AM ] |

Marty Barrett mentions me on his website, so I'm going to mention him mentioning me to perpetuate the let's-all-comment-on-how-adorabe-we-are-all-the-time-and-waste-our-entire-lives-blathering-on-endlessly-about-nothing-and-while-we're-at-it-can-I-jerk-you-off-festival that is the Internet.


Marty posts:
My friend Steve now has his own website, as they all do, and he deserves a great deal of credit for keeping it updated as opposed to saying things like, "Hey, I'd like a website!" and getting all his friends interested in his plans and then not following through with them. Which is not what Steve does.

But Marty's being funny, because that is what I do. All the time. I have lots of great ideas, and I can imagine doing each and every one of them. Whether it's starting a rockabilly band or doing laundry, while I'm having an idea, and immediately afterwards, I'm fully committed to following my dream through to its completion. So when I say, "Hey, kids! Let's put on a show!" I really mean it, but then I get bored, or discouraged or The Littlest Groom comes on and I'll do something else instead.

I'm jealous of people who have one idea. That's what I need in my life--one idea. An obsession, even.

And a lot of money.

A few weeks ago I read part of Dan Kennedy's Loser Goes First, a very funny memoir of failure and giving up. But I lost it. That's not a joke, either. I really lost it.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 6:45 PM ] |

I bought the book Blankets because Gus said it was good. The last time anyone bought anything because someone on the Internet recommended it was in 1998. But Gus was right, Blankets is "a genuine comic book triumph." (Although it's a little heavy on the teen-angst for my taste.)

Also: Go to songfight. The idea: a song title is posted and anyone in the world is encouraged to submit a song with that title. The songs are judged by everyone else, and a winner is declared. Musical battle royal!

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 6:13 PM ] |

I think a pulled-pork, barbeque sandwich is a perfectly valid choice for breakfast.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 10:47 AM ] |

Here's a valentine's card for you from www.youyesyou.net

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 11:41 AM ] |

I'm going to make robyn some oatmeal and tea.

   [ POSTED BY Steve Johnson @ 10:03 AM ] |